Thursday, May 19, 2011

Women are to be Seen and Not Heard.

"Christian women", are you as faithful and dutiful as you think?

If you are an intelligent and discerning woman with a modicum of self respect and have still found some way to maintain a Christian perspective then you are not.

Shame on you!

At least this is what the Bible teaches.

Shame in copuous doses.

Christian women listen up;

There are simply some things that are better left to men.
You are created to be man's companion, his helper, and his servant.
If you don't understand something, you are permitted to ask your husband, who will explain it to you.
You are made beautiful, only so that you can hide that beauty from all who look at you, and yet you are made to be seen and not heard.
You are not made for any truth or promise but those your father or husband allows.
You are made for one man to choose to take ownership and responsibility for you and to care for you in all things.
You are to serve him as he serves his lord.
This is all done with the humble understanding that sin began with a woman tempting a man and that because of that you are the reason for death in the world.
Be grateful for man's love and care for you and accept it in all graciousness. Give your man his sexual pleasure when he asks for it with no amount of regard for your own selfish wants and needs and always be mindful of your "dirty time" so that you don't sully the man in the eyes of god.
If you are raped or sexually assaulted by a man who is not your fiance, ensure that you yell loud enough for all to hear and that your fiance receives due recompense for the rapists crime against his property, and then beg for his forgiveness for your own immorality. (Oh and say goodbye to him as well since you will now be marrying your rapist instead. Kind of a "You broke it, you bought it approach to sexual assault)

This and a little faith is all that it takes to be a dutiful Christian woman.

If you are a Christian woman, and you are not living your life by these simple tenets then you are doing your ideology a disservice and only playing at being a Christian. If you are a Christian and also a modern, independant and powerful woman, you had better give your religion another thought because the bible says that Christianity is not for you.

1 comment:

  1. Oh, and don't forget about the hair! A woman is not to cut it, as it is her crowning glory! The Mennos got that one right. Never cut it, but only the husband gets to see it splayed across the pillow. Otherwise it must be in a bun, pulled back so tight that it would make Joan Rivers jealous.
    If you're a woman with a receding hairline and an inch-wide part you knows you'se gettin' into heaven!