Top 10 Reasons that Santa is Better than Jesus

What're YOU looking at?

It's that time of year again.  With all the cries of people taking Christ out of season, and the sobs of liberals bemoaning consumerism with Christmas, I thought that we could take a minute to compare the two through their chosen avatars.


IT'S TIIIIIME!

SANTA VS JESUS!! 

(Ready Santa?)

As long as this (nomnomnom) doesn't interrupt my cookie, (nomnom)...you can stay on the "good" list.

(Ready Jesus?)

WAIT!!! I didn't know the camera was rolling, I swear he was this way when I got here!

Oh Jesus, you are such a joker....

Let's waste no time and get to the list.

10. You don't have to die to see Santa.
Although to be fair he doesn't really get seen a lot, but he does leave presents in his wake.
         
9.   You don't have to believe in Santa to get a present.
He seems to favour the living, and his rules for judging good and bad are far less....... evil? (Seriously Jesus, beating sassy children isn't helping your cause)

8.   Santa shows up on time.
 (Jesus is 2000 yrs late!)

I've been busy!  You think I was just hanging around??

7.   Jesus doesn't provide seasonal Employment
Although his employees provide lots of income for people in the mental health professions...

6.   Santa loves figs!
They drive Jesus as nutty as squirrel poo...

5.   Santa doesn't ask for donations

4.   You don't have to eat Santa

Body and blood??? Ummm, not in THIS cookie is it?

3.   Santa only wants milk and cookies, Jesus wants your soul!
Although, again to be fair, Jesus doesn't break into your house to get it.

You SURE that you hate your genitals and all the same people I do?  Ok then, you're safe.

2.   Santa's employees aren't pedophiles

I don't always slag Jesus but when I do, I hit below the robes....AND SO DO HIS PRIESTS! *drums*

And the number one reason that Santa is better than Jesus is.......

1.   Santa isn't a republican

Umm, this is awkward but could you just play down our relationship a bit Mitt?

It was close on a couple of points, and Santa's penchant for break and enter crime certainly helped you, but for now Jesus will have to settle for a divine  "maybe next year Jesus..."


MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!

Top 5 Science FAILS in the Koran

As long as they can't see where they are going, they can't prove me wrong!

Let's be clear.  No one says that faulty science in a holy book disproves the existence of a God.  It has no bearing on that claim at all.  What it DOES have a bearing on is the claim that the science revealed in the Koran IS proof of God's existence. 

Before we get to the list I would like to briefly address this.  There is not a single scientific revelation in the Koran. 

Not one

You sure? Are you saying this was a waste of time??

You can't claim that science was revealed in the Koran if people didn't understand it at the time.  If it was not revealed by any means but in retrospect then it wasn't revealed at all.  In order to "reveal" something, you must make it clear to the person, otherwise it is still hidden from us.  Making claims to knowledge that wasn't exampled by men of that time because of a vague simularity in the text or a non-specific passage that may resemble modern scientific understanding is intellectually dishonest and rife with confirmation bias. 

Get it?

If you think the Big Bang was revealed in the Koran because it talks about the expanses of heaven, but NOT ONE Muslim scientist ever actually spoke of that model for the universe in any way then your claim is a false one. 

It wasn't revealed

There is something behind this curtain... what is it?  You'll have to wait 400 years to know what I have revealed today!

Enough of that.

Let's look at the 5 best examples of bad science in the Koran;

                                    Man didn't Evolve??

"O mankind! Be careful of your duty to your Lord Who created you from a single soul and from it created its mate and from them twain hath spread abroad a multitude of men and women. Be careful of your duty toward Allah in Whom ye claim (your rights) of one another, and toward the wombs (that bare you). Lo! Allah hath been a watcher over you."  -(4:1)

Men and women all came from a single pair?  Not only is that pretty incestuous, but it is scientifically wrong.  There was no first man and first woman and humans certainly weren't created in our current forms!

Ok, maybe HIS ancestors were.

Evolution explains this quite clearly.  We evolved into our current forms from our biological ancestors and they evolved from theirs and so on.  It is such a gradual process that you can't pin down one generation as the first humans any more than you can pinpoint the exact moment when an infant becomes a toddler or when boy becomes a man.  Clearly the Muslim's who wrote this had no understanding of the biological history of the human race.  Strangely evolution has been suggested by many cultures many years before this, so it wasn't even an unknown idea at the time! 

FAIL Islam!

The Universe was made in 6 days?

"And We did certainly create the heavens and earth and what is between them in six days, and there touched Us no weariness"

-50:38

The Universe was created in 6 days???  Pretty sure that we all know that is not scientifically accurate.  It took billions of years for the Earth develop after the Big Bang.  Plus or minus a few million years.  Do you know what number is really close to a few million??

Not sure but it is NOT 6!!

FAIL Islam!

Thunder is an Angel??

"And the thunder exalts [ Allah ] with praise of Him - and the angels [as well] from fear of Him - and He sends thunderbolts and strikes therewith whom He wills while they dispute about Allah ; and He is severe in assault" -13:13

Ummm, really?  There have been SCIENTIFIC hypotheses on the nature of Thunder since Aristotle in the 3rd Century...

......BC! 

Sounds like a shock wave in the air due to the sudden thermal expansion of the plasma in the lightning channel, but what do I know? It's probably an Angel.

So why is the Koran still depending on Angels and Demons to explain natural processes?

Islam FAIL!!

Sperm comes from behind the Ribs and the Spine??

"He was created from a fluid, ejected emerging from between the backbone and the ribs." -86:6-7

Many Muslims will steadfastly maintain the truth of this one, because some of the seminal fluid originates from that general area.  But the damning part of the verse is that "he" was CREATED from this fluid.  That part of the fluid is the sperm.  That is the active ingredient of the seminal fluid and the only part needed to create life.  The rest of the fluid is only a carrier and has no part in the actual fertilization process. 

The crazy part of this one is that THIS too was a fact that was at least believed by very early man.  Aristotle not only believed that the fertilizing agent came from the testicles but that each testicle was responsible for the birthing of one gender.  So that tying the "male one" off (or cutting it off) would ensure the other one ruled sex selection and the woman would birth a girl.  THIS was crazy, but at least they were on the right track.

You want me to do what?!?

Allah keeps the Birds aloft?!?

"Do they not see the birds controlled in the atmosphere of the sky? None holds them up except Allah . Indeed in that are signs for a people who believe" -16:79

Really?  Is THAT what is keeping them in the magical skies?  Not the nature of aerodynamics, lift or thrust, not any of those things? 

How do I do it?  Well, it's a combination of pixie dust, angel spit, and a healthy distaste for science.

Magic!

Seriously?  Magic is the Islamic explaination for the power of flight in birds?

So this is a sign for unbelievers?  Yea, the VERSE is a sign.  A sign of the inaccuracy of the Koran, and one more reason to not believe anything it says.

What do YOU think?

Is this the word of middle age sheep herders or the word of a Supreme being?

Top 5 WWJD Answers



The Bible Doesn't Say that it DIDN'T happen...


What Would Jesus Do?
We see this age old question posed in the form of bumper stickers, posters, jewelry and even in the form of tattoos



What would he do?  He would get a tattoo that can only be read when giving you the finger is what he'd do!

 
Would he hate all the same people that we do?
Would he vote for the same Tea Parties that we do?
Would he deny all the same science that we do?

It is hard to say.

In order to answer these questions, and to ensure that we are looking down our noses at the right people,


Pffft, Stupid Richard Dawkins

we need to go to the source. 


No, not Ken Hovind. 


He just thinks that Jesus wouldn't pay taxes



Or Ray Comfort 

Pretty sure that this is him

I mean the Bible.

I have compiled a short list of 10 things that we can be SURE Jesus would do, as detailed by his clearly accurate biography, the New Testament.

Top 5 Things that Jesus Would Do.

5.  He would be a bit irrational about his fruit.  Specifically Figs.  God hates Figs and that hatred has been passed on to the son in this case.  He has been seen yelling at them, cursing them to never bear fruit again, comparing them to his vile enemies and throwing tantrums for them being out of season when he is hungry.  So don't expect him to behave in the fruits and vegetable section of the grocery store.  This brings us to the next thing that Jesus would do....

4.    He would kick some vendor ass!  If his casting out of the money lenders taught us anything (and we like to think it has), it is that Jesus hates sidewalk sales and that he was probably the worlds first case of 'roid rage.  (Probably ate some out of season figs)  This is where Jesus completely flipped his wig, whipping vendors for their money morals, overturning tables and throwing their money all over the place.  No word if his roid rage extends to garage sales or church bake sales.

You're next!

3.     Jesus would take care of all the parental discipline problems of the world.  How you ask?  What amazing technique would he reveal in order to mentor our children to behave as we wish them to? 

Fear. 

Mind crippling, life threatening fear.

He would threaten them with death.  That would sort them out.  Well, maybe not initially, but once Jesus killed a few of our childrens' sassy friends and fear of defiance becomes overwhelming, I imagine that obedience follows shortly thereafter.

2.     Jesus wouldn't wash his hands before supper.  He didn't believe in bacteria, or dirt or cooties coming from dirty hands.  All he believed could make you sick was your actions (largly comprised of actions relating to your genitalia).  I think that it is a layover from all the trouble he got into from his dad for hanging out with prostitutes.

We can only assume that these holes are the result of his dirty, infected hands

1.     What would he use these dirty smelly hands for?  Beating slaves.  I know, I know "There is no more slavery" you say.  And I agree!  But Michelle Bachman and many Republicans believe that african american families were better off during the slave years, and Adrian Peterson thinks that his multi million dollar paycheck is only a shackle for the slavery that is the NFL so maybe slavery DOES exist in the modern world.  I would think that Jesus would DEFINITELY compare gay marriage to slavery, and a million dollar job? 

Definitely slavery.

Maybe he will decide that these are the people need the first beatings.  Could we be so lucky?

Bonus Answer!     He would secretly give the salvation finger to atheists and anyone else who doesn't believe in him.  If his parables have made any impact other than completely confusing people and making them misinterpret his every word, then Jesus didn't mean to do it.  He doesn't want to convert unbelievers, he doesn't even like us, but he DOES want to maintain his professional appearance and make it appear that he is trying to.  This is why Jesus invented parables.  To ensure that the terrible people (meaning people who don't have a Jesus fish on their car) don't mingle in heaven with his homies.  Believers will already know what his stories mean, leaving confused atheists and other religions out in the cold. 

Or, er, hot.

Ever wonder why Heaven is a gated community?  Just one more way to keep the riff raff out.

Where is your Muhammed NOW? (Shut the gate Peter)

Does all this not sound at all like the Jesus you knew? 

Don't worry, he'll be back with his zombie army to stab, burn, trample, and generally get all killy with us. 

You can ask him to clarify everything then. 

Top 10 Biblical Prophecy FAILS.

If the bible is to be accepted as divine, then it is reasonable to assume that it's prophecies will be unfailing. Divine and omniscient power can't save the bible from being horribly transparent when it comes to the man made origins of it's "prophecies".

Not even modern apologetics can explain some of these horrible prognostications.

Christians love to point to prophecy in the bible as evidence for it's divinity, but their prophecies usually lie in one of two categories. The first is a prophecy that is vague enough and common enough to apply to something modern day if you look hard enough (and they usually can be applied to many different incidents across history if interpreted with bible coloured glasses long enough).
A great example of this would be Isaiah 13:13;

"Therefore I will make the heavens tremble; and the earth will shake from its place at the wrath of the LORD Almighty, in the day of his burning anger."

A Christian might claim that the earthquake in Japan was the fulfillment of that prophecy and take this as evidence of coming end times. However this could just as easily applied to ANY major earthquake in the earth's history. It is a vague enough example of a common occurrence that it is easily claimed as a fulfilled "prophecy" when it is really just confirmation biased interpretation. 

The second is a prophecy that is a "no brainer". This is a prophecy whose fulfillment is inevitable. Take, for example, any prophecy that Christians cite as predicting the unrest in the Middle East. Is this common claim a difficult one to make "prophecy" about?  Isn't it pretty obvious that there will be numerous wars in that historically war torn geographical area? Couldn't any of us make nonsense predictions like this and then claim godly inspiration after the virtually inescapable has happened? This kind of "prophecy" is a no brainer that doesn't require a "touch of the divine" to reveal it's likelihood, and is not the sort that we will deal with today.

We will look at prophecies that are specific in their subject and pointed in their prophecy.  Only one is needed to rule out divine authorship but I will give you 10 just to be sure.

10 different sorts of FAILURE.  

Here are 10 of the best failed prophecies from the bible.  These are prophecies that are specific enough to be verified or debunked at a simple glance.

Have fun reading!

Top 10 Bible Prophecy FAILS

 1.Isaiah 17:1 

"An oracle concerning Damascus: See, Damascus will no longer be a city but will become a heap of ruins."

 FAIL:  Damascus is generally considered the oldest continuously inhabited city in the world and it is still inhabited today with almost two million people.  Never in it's history was never a time where it ceased to be a city.  How did the "Lord Almighty" miss that one? Two million people is not exactly a "Where's Waldo".


2.Isaiah 19:4-5

"I will hand the Egyptians over to the power of a cruel master, and a fierce king will rule over them, declares the Lord, the LORD Almighty. The waters of the river will dry up, and the riverbed will be parched and dry."

FAIL: The river mentioned here is the Nile which has never dried up in since historians began to keep records of such things (nor even in the oral record of times before).  How does an omniscient being miss one of the largest rivers in the world?  Once he realized it wasn't going to dry up, couldn't he just have willed it to happen just to keep his rep intact?  Guess me must have forgotten about this one. 

3.  Isaiah 52:1

"Awake, awake, O Zion, clothe yourself with strength. Put on your garments of splendor, O Jerusalem, the holy city. The uncircumcised and defiled will not enter you again."

FAIL: Um, there is currently no restriction on uncircumcised men entering the city. How would you even pass such a law, let alone enforce it?  It is hard enough getting people to accept the airport scanners without telling them they have to whip it out for an official "ant-eater" hunt too.


4.   Ezekiel 30:10-11

 "This is what the Sovereign LORD says: I will put an end to the hordes of Egypt by the hand of Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon. He and his army - the most ruthless of nations - will be brought in to destroy the land. They will draw their swords against Egypt and fill the land with the slain."

FAIL: Ezekiel predicts that Nebuchadnezzar of Babylon will conquer Egypt filling it's borders with the slain. In 568 BCE Nebuchadnezzar attempted to conquer Egypt without success. Egypt's king ruled for another generation and outlived Nebuchadnezzar thereby escaping the fulfillment of this prophecy. The Egyptians were not scattered or dispersed or slain in droves across the lands.

5.   Ezekiel 29:10-11

"therefore I am against you and against your streams,and I will make the land of Egypt a ruin and a desolate waste from Migdol to Aswan, as far as the border of Cush. The foot of neither man nor beast will pass through it; no one will live there for forty years."

FAIL: Egypt has NEVER been uninhabited, let alone for forty years, in it's history (since it's inception). It is currently inhabited by almost 80 million people.

6   .Matthew 16:28, Matthew 23:36, Matthew 24:34

16:28

"I tell you the truth, some who are standing here will not taste death before they see the Son of Man coming in his kingdom."

23:36

"I tell you the truth, all this will come upon this generation."

24:34

"I tell you the truth, this generation will certainly not pass away until all these things have happened."

FAIL: Jesus says very clearly that the things that would demarcate the end of the world would be fulfilled before that era's current generation passed away.  He said that  it would happen before the people that were standing in front of him "tasted death". That was 2000 years ago.  Either he is a terrible prognosticator, or he is habitually late.  SO late in fact that people die and a hundred generations can pass before he remembers his promises. I think that being 2000 years late qualifies this one as FAILED.


7.   Isaiah 7:14

"Therefore the Lord himself shall give you a sign; Behold,a virgin shall conceive, and bear a son, and shall call his name Immanuel."

FAIL: It is Christian tradition to accept that Jesus was born to a virgin. This is a translation error but it merits being mentioned. The "virgin" in this verse is a mistranslation of the Hebrew word "almah", which means "young woman".  A young woman is not necessarily a virgin. "Bethulah" would have been the correct word to use if the author meant virgin. Now on to the prophecy... nowhere in the New Testament is Jesus referred to as Immanuel.  Can't the writers even fulfill prophecy that was in earlier chapters of their own book??  So either Jesus wasn't that son, or he has a brother that hasn't come yet whose name is Immanuel, or this one is total nonsense.  Either way, the prophecy is left unfulfilled.  I can't get over how the bible's editors let this one slip by.  JK Rowling would never stand for this. 

8.   Matthew 2:23

 "And he came and dwelt in a city called Nazareth: that it might be fulfilled which was spoken by the prophets, He shall be called a Nazarene."

FAIL: Nowhere in the Old Testament is such a prophecy found, so how could such a one be fulfilled? Why talk about a divine prophecy that isn't even found in the "inerrant" word of that divinity?

9.    Genesis 4:12

"When you cultivate the ground, it will no longer yield its strength to you; you will be a vagrant and a wanderer on the earth."

FAIL: As a punishment for killing Abel, God says Cain will be "a fugitive and a vagabond." Seems like a pretty light punishment for murder but looks like God can't even hold this "prophecy" true. In a mere four verses later (4:16-17) Cain settles down, marries, has a son, and is the founder of his very own city. This is a pretty sweet deal for a fugitive and a vagabond.  I am pretty sure that there is not criminal on the face of the earth who wouldn't accept THAT as punishment for their crime. I can see it now. "Oh yea God, you done me good!  I learned my lesson.  I wish that I could live in my own filth on the run from the law like all my other vagabond/fugitive friends instead of living with my family and having my own city.  This is BS! I truly regret my crimes *wink wink*"


10. 2 Samuel 7:16 

 "Your house and your kingdom will endure forever before me; your throne will be established forever.”

FAIL: God says that David's kingdom will last forever. By forever he must have meant 400 years.  I mean, what would David know then?  He would be dead. So he allowed it to be destroyed about 400 years after Solomon's death, never to be rebuilt.  So does forever=400 years? 
 
If your answer is no (and grade 1 math reveals that "no" IS the answer) then we can see the inerrant bible revealed for what it is....
 
.....The writings of men, and completely fallible.
 
I just want to point out that I am not interested in debating other prophecies at this point.  If the bible is divine, it shouldn't be this easy to pick 10 and debunk them almost effortlessly.
 
If this isn't evidence against the divinity of the terrible book called the bible, I don't know what is.
 
Peace











Sources-www.truthsaves.com
Www.sab.com
Www.biblegateway.com

Top 5 Wierdest Things in the Bible

There are many bizarre and nonsensical stories in the bible, but these ones take the cake!  For a book loved and read by so many, it remains as crazy as Mel Gibson on a Sunday afternoon.

In the interest of fairness Atheist Evolution contacted God for an interview to give HIS take on each of these seemingly nonsensical passages in order that he might shed some light on them.

Lets take a look at the craziest stories that theists love to forget;

Number 5- Onan's fatal twist of conscience (Genesis 38:7-10)

Crazy Level- 1 Mel Gibson.

  

God kills Onan's brother, then his father commands him to have sex with his brother's widow so that the brother can have an heir (?!?), and while in the act, Onan feels guilt and pulls out before he "finishes" spilling his seed on the ground.  Onan has no issue having sex with his recently murdered brother's wife (nor with the logic that says the act will actually produce his brother's heir) but only that he might impregnate her and then be a "baby daddy".   God doesn't seem to have issue with murdering people, nor with adultery or incest, but SPILLING SEED?? That is too much, so God gets all killy on him too. 

Not only does God not seem to understand how "lineage" works, (and that Onan's priorities seem a bit ... off) but you would think that if God were writing his own biography that he might leave out the parts that make him look bad.

God's official interview response;

 "I don't mind putting down some killin' on wicked people, and I certainly don't mind not killing incestuous siblings getting some sweet sweet widow, but for Onan to ruin the money shot like that?  Unforgivable!!!  We can all agree that he had to die right?"

Is he on drugs?


Number 4- Ehud and his fatty felony (Judges 3:12-30)

Crazy level- 2 Mel Gibson's

The Israelites call out to God for him to free them from the tyranny of their King of 18 years, and he sent them Ehud, apparently a master ninja (Jewjitsu?).  What was his ninja skill?  Being left handed.  He would sneak his assassin sword in the palace because apparently no one would think to look on his RIGHT thigh, because that was pretty rare for a person to be left handed.  The problem?  His left thigh is, like, 8 inches away from his right.  HOW CAN THEY MISS THAT?

But I digress....

He is sent to kill the king, so kill him he does.  When he thrusts his well hidden (right thigh?  Really?!?) sword into the fat king's belly, the story makes more about all the gravy that spills out and how deep the sword went into his belly.  (it disappears completely)  Apparently the deeper it goes, the more evil the victim. 
The REALLY strange part?  His attendants don't check on him because they think that he is relieving himself.  They think he is relieving himself with his guest in the room with him???

They don't notice his blade because it is on his right side, and then think that their king is having a poo while his guest is giving him a gift?

They are not very clever assistants are they?

God's Interview response;

"Wow, he really was a fatty wasn't he?  I had a great time setting this one up.  I mean, clearly they had the forces to take the city without killing their king (as they did it shortly thereafter anyway) but I had made a bet with Jesus about whether the fat would just close up over the sword or not.  Clearly I won.  Omniscience, hello!"

Just a strange inclusion that goes on long enough about how fat the king was that it gets awkward.

Number 3- Elisha and Gods Righteous Wrath! (2 Kings 23-25)

Crazy Level- 3 Mel Gibson's

Elisha was an ancient superhero and generally was pretty full of awesome.  He was also bald, and from this passage we get that he was pretty sensitive about it.  In his travels we find this intrepid hero victim to a group of rowdy children's insults.  They call to him "Baldy!" and "Go on up, Baldy!"  and  "Go up that hill Baldy!"...you get the idea.  Mostly they called him Baldy with some other words thrown in for nonsensical measure.
They weren't very clever, but it DID get under his skin.  He called to God to smite them.

Smiting?  Really? Smiting children for being, well, children??

But God didn't really do it right?  NO, HE TOTALLY DID!

He sent 2 she bears to kill all 42 children.  Mauled them to death.

And then Elisha carried on his mighty way.

What could possibly be the message here?!?

God's Interview Response;

"Yea, it might SEEM like a disproportionate response, but remember it was a different time.  A time when people were used to getting mauled by bears for the most innocent of slights.  It was also a culture that really didn't appreciate being called "baldy".  That was the worst insult of the time, and since words are power, I knew that only MY magic could counteract the powerful words that those children had thrown at my prophet.  I mean how is he supposed to continue being so badass if he is always worried about how people see his bald head?  This guy killed GIANTS for me's sake!  Clearly I needed him.  Those kids got in the way.  Mans got to protect his homies!"

Silly yet bloodthirsty, Christians love to defend and explain away such bizarre oversensitivity and brutal response.


Number 2-Noah's Perverted Son (Genesis 9:20-27)

 Crazy Level- 4 Mel Gibson's

Having been out all day long working, Noah decided that drinking was the best way to end a hard day.  (I have to agree!) He passed out as very drinky people are wont to do.  Noah was obviously a strange little dude as his drunken binge was of the naked variety and when he passed out, he passed out in clear view of anyone who would enter his tent.

Completely uncovered.

This sound like penthouse forum yet?  Well here's where we change track....
He was discovered by his son.

Did his son cover up dear ol dad to save him embarrassment?  Nope, he went to tell his brothers so that they could see their wacky daddy in all his glory.

Not TOO strange yet, but Noah's reaction suggests that he did something else too.  What did he do?  Did he just stare?  Did he enjoy his "company"?  Did he rub cheese on his genitals?  Who knows, but it was serious enough that he sentenced his brother's son to slavery!

That's it.

The whole story.

God's interview response;

"I promised Noah that I would never tell.  What happens in a man's vineyard tent stays in a man's vineyard tent."

I can't even THINK of anything that this could be trying to teach.  It is just pure 200 proof nonsensihol.

How can the Bible top all this crazy?   There is one more, read on.....


Number 1- Wives Forbidden from Brushing against the genitals of ... Her Husbands Attacker! (Deuteronomy 25:11-12)

Crazy Level- 5 whole Mel Gibson's!

If a man fights with his countryman, and his wife comes to pull her husband out of the fray to save him from getting pummeled,  but she accidentally grabs his junk, the punishment mandated by God is that he show no mercy......TO HER!!!  He is to cut her hand off.



Seriously!

The price that she pays for defending her husband is having the hand that does it CUT OFF!!!

There is no rhyme or reason for this passage, it is just mere quakery!

Seriously this is nuttier than squirrel poo, and there seems to be no connection to anything else.  Just a random toked up passage from genital hating ancients (or woman hating, depending on how you see it)

God's Interview response;

"Oh, seriously?  Are you bringing THIS one up?  Ugh, I wrote that one very early on and was just answering the prayer of a man who was embarrassed by his wife grabbing his neighbours(very small) package during a perfectly reasonable fist fight.  I never thought it would come up again. She was left handed anyway, what's the big deal?  Ah, who are we kidding?  I am just trying to keep the apologists guessing.  It's fun to see how they try to make THIS one make sense!"

I have no answer to this one.  It is just too weird!

Bible?  Come on now!  Can't you just PRETEND to make some sense, at least SOME of the time??

Top 10 Worst Reasons to Believe in a God.

Here is a list of common arguments for god that fail from the very outset.




1-Fine tuning


This is the argument that there must be a divine artificer because the universe is so complex and so fine tuned for our survival.

Since the universe came billions and billions of years before we did, it is obvious that the universe isn't fine tuned for US but rather we simply developed to survive in, and are bound to the natural laws of, the universe in which we find ourselves.  We could have developed no other way.

2-Blind watchmaker/Complexity

This is a very easy one to debunk.  It is easy to be convinced by this one, but the watch is "obviously" made by a watchmaker, because we know that watches are made by men.  To conflate man made creations with nature is a mistake. Complexity arises from chaos in many instances in reality (IE-fractal structures) ever see a snowflake?


3-Appeal to popularity

Convincing yourself that belief must be right because all societies have believed in god (they haven't; Watch about Pirahãs) or that most everyone does is not convincing.  Or at least shouldn't be.  "Most people" once believed that the earth was flat.  See how that went?

4-Appeal to authority

Very similar to appeal to popularity.  This time it is the meme of the name dropper.  Merely saying that a famous or intelligent person also believes so therefor so should we, is a statement that asks you to believe not based on evidence, but by devaluing your own intelligence and over valuing the celebrity's.  Who knows how that person came to that belief, trust your own intellect and never let belief come from respect of a person, but out of respect for the evidence that he presents.

5-God of Gaps or the first cause

VERY common.  Where did we come from?  Or science can't explain this!  Not knowing something does not imply a divine conclusion.  It merely means that we need to explore and seek evidence that we can test for a conclusion that is based in that evidence.  An unanswered question only implies that we don't know.

6-Anecdotal evidence or He revealed himself to me

"He revealed himself to me" or "My experiences teach me that god is real"  These are false indicators for truth about the nature of the universe.  There have been many people who had Napoleon reveal themselves to them, or the devil, or Odin.  How is this revelation any different?  Your experience may lead you to evidence, but if you don't expose them to skepticism and rigorous testing, then they leave you with assumptions about the universe.  That is it.

7-Objective morality Plato's Euthyphro Dilemma

There can be no objective morality.  Either morality is decided by us as a means of enabling us to survive in a social environment, or it is decided upon by god.  If it is decided upon by god, then it STILL isn't objective because he simply made them up subjectively as a way to assist us in living harmoniously in a societal structure.

Either way, it is subjective.  So a call to objective morality is a false one.


8-Only god can help the universe escape entropy

False.  This is usually a false interpretation of the 2nd law of thermodynamics.  This only applies in a closed system.  Which clearly people are not. There are many outside influences and outside sources of energy that affect us (the sun).

9-Divinity of the bible

This is the "The bible says that God exists, and I know that the bible is true, because God says it is.  How do I know?  Its in the bible"

This is circular reasoning.

If you have no proof of the divinity of the bible, then you are taking it on man made authority.  If there is nothing in the bible that couldn't have been known by men of the time, then  divinity clearly can't be established and nothing in the bible can be established as true on that scriptural basis.


10-Ontological argument

This is the argument that a function of perfection is existence, otherwise it wouldn't be perfect.  So if you can conceive of the perfect being, then he must exist because if he doesn't exist then you aren't thinking of the perfect being.
Therefor if he is thinking of the perfect being, then he is thinking of a being that exists.
This argument fails right off by the principles of bare assertion fallacy and is bound to the same standards of evidence that everything else is.  You can't just assert that things are true without saying why they are true, or citing reasons for it.


If these are your arguments, you have some thinking to do.

If they are not, and you feel that you have a good and logical one that will stand up to peer review, then please, by all means, share it with us.

Secular 10 commandments

After having thought about it for a long time, and having no respect for the biblical 10 commandments I am going to post 10 for a secular society that have far more relevance and meaning than the bibles ever did.


10. Determine what is moral by using your own brain and this simple tenet. Does this action cause harm?

9. Do not buy into any dogmatic belief. Dogma keeps you from making morality decisions.

8. Question everything. Have a healthy respect for evidence and always keep an open mind about your beliefs in case they are wrong.

7. Seek knowledge and recognize that education is the key to understanding. Do not ignore contrary evidence, to the contrary, you should explore it.

6. Do not do to others as you would not want them to do to you.

5. Live each day with joy and wonder.

4. Exercise, and stay healthy.

3. Never be silent in the face of wrong doing. Evil requires nothing but that good men stay silent.

2. Be truthful, even if it is inconvenient and uncomfortable.

1. Do not take these commandments as authoritarian.

It all boils down to "Don't be an ass"

Maybe we should call them 10 Secular suggestions for good and moral living.

Certainly better than the bibles, and less open to harmful interpretation.

What do YOU think?

10 Signs that you are Brainwashed by Christianity.

10. You vigorously deride belief in the existence of other gods (Thor, Osiris, Ganesha, etc...) as foolish, and archaic, but feel persecuted if someone derides belief in your god.

9. You are insulted and incredulous when scientists state that people evolved from "lower" life forms, but have no problem with your bible stating that we were created from dirt.

8. You think polytheism is archaic, and silly but have no problem with a "trinity"god.

7. You go crazy when you hear how the Quran commands beating women, or killing atheists and Jews, but you think it is a moral allegory when the bible commands genocide, or when god orders the slaughter of all the babies in Egypt, or even when he orders the "untouched" women to be raped as spoils of war.

6. You think that evidence for god is merely a question for which you don't know the answer. IE-"Where did beauty come from? God did it" or "Why are things so complex? God did it."

5. You think that the burden of proof lies with Atheists to disprove your claim, instead of on you to provide evidence for your own.

4. You think that there is a place that God sends people who don't believe as you do, to suffer in pain, torment and torture. Not only are you OK with this, but you still consider your religion "tolerant" and your god "loving".

3. Geology conclusively proving that the flood didn't happen, or history proving that the bible was written by man, or science proving that the earth is 5 billion years old doesn't convince you, but one idiot rolling around speaking gibberish and calling it tongues is all the evidence that you need.

2. You laugh at the claim that Greek gods slept with women, but don't blink an eye when recounting the story of the holy spirit impregnating Mary (without her permission), giving birth to a man/god who was sent by himself, as a blood sacrifice to himself, to appease himself, to convince himself to forgive his creations of things that he himself knew they would do, then to raise himself from
the dead to ascend and be with himself again.


1. You think that the story of a man who lied to his son, brought him to an altar under false pretenses, tied him up in terror, and raised a knife with the intent to look into his eyes and slaughter him, is a good and moral story. You think that it was good that he proved his loyalty to his lord, you are OK with the evil concept of blood sacrifice and even more than OK that a supposedly moral God would command such a thing.

Runner up- You think that it is a mythological story to hear about Icarus flying too close to the sun, but Jonah surviving for 3 days inside a whale is perfectly reasonable.

Runner up #2- You think that a 0.01% success rate for prayer is proof of god, or that things that might have happened anyway, happened merely because YOU wanted them to and you prayed for it. You think that the other 99.99% is just an example of Gods mysterious ways.

(#2A- You would rather convince yourself that you are helping by sitting alone and thinking about someone, and call it prayer, then actually getting up off your ass and DOING something.)


Here is a message to Christians everywhere;

If you can identify with any of these things, you need to seriously rethink your beliefs, your morality, and your parental skills and....

READ A BOOK!